Do You Have What It Takes To Be A Paranormal Investigator?

GoofyPGIHeather

Intrepid paranormal investigator Heather Dobson. Wearing eye makeup for a DragonCon panel. Yep, you read that right. Eye makeup. Sometimes we DO go out in the daytime. Photo credit: Grant Miller

CALLING ALL PARANORMAL ENTHUSIASTS!

DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A PARANORMAL INVESTIGATOR? THEN YOU’RE IN LUCK! BECAUSE WE’RE RECRUITING!

But wait. Before you start jumping up and down and squeeeee-ing with excitement, let’s back up a moment and really talk about this.

I know that if you’re reading this, you probably avidly watch Ghost Hunters, Ghost Adventures, Ghost Asylum, Ghost Insert-Word-Here-That-Is-Scary-And-Attention-Grabbing, and any other paranormal-themed show you can get your grubby DVR on. (I know, because even though I investigate the paranormal in my spare time, I also still watch all the paranormal things!) But, guess what? Actually investigating the paranormal is NOTHING like what you see on TV.

Here are some bullet points that pretty much sum up what it’s really like to do what we do:

  • Many times, the client who contacts us is more scary than the paranormal something that may or may not be in their home. No lie. Our Case Manager is a saint.
  • We don’t get paid to do this. In fact, we have to pay to do this. Yep, we buy all the equipment, we pay for the gas to get to and from our investigations, and we buy our own dinners on investigation nights. And the coffee. LOTS of coffee. Hoo, boy, there’s not enough coffee. Save your coffee pennies because you’re going to need them!
  • After actually getting an investigation scheduled, then we have to actually do the investigation. Like, set up equipment, and sit in a dark house for hours when, really, let’s be honest, we just want to be curled up in bed asleep.
  • And why would we rather be asleep instead of investigating? Because after doing this for eight years, I can honestly tell you that most investigations are boring. Like, all those ghost shows take place over several days, in well-known haunted places, with evidence that may or may not be planted for entertainment purposes. But in real life? We can’t make ghosts appear on cue. We have to wait around in the dark. A lot.
  • And after you’ve just spend all those hours in someone’s home, you now have to go home and watch those hours of video camera footage times 4 (because there were four cameras set up). And then? You have all those hours of audio to listen to. And in between all that, you have a family to take care of, and a job to go to, and a social life, and… yeah. That’s a lot to do.
  • Maybe, after all that investigating and all that analyzing, you were assigned to write the final report. WHAT?!? Yeah. So, get on that. Because the client is SCREAMING for results.
  • Now? That you’ve sent in that all-important final report? We need you to collect the raw data from this investigation and add it to our database/spreadsheet. Because we’re also scientists and this is part of our responsibilities.
  • Good job! The final report is in! Data is collected! Guess what? You’ve got to pack up all your equipment and do it again because we have ANOTHER investigation this weekend! Social life? WHAT SOCIAL LIFE?!?!?!
  • Finally, after all that is done, you’ve got ten monthly meetings to attend, library talks and DragonCon panels to help put together, and blog posts to write for this here web site. (I can’t do it all by myself, yo!)
  • And how do you think we get our name out there for all of those clients to notice us and call us? Well, it’s called social media. Are you prepared to help out with that, as well? Because we certainly don’t have an advertising budget (heck, we barely have an equipment budget), we need all the help we can get!

Finally, when you look at how many paranormal shows there are out there and then look at the actual number of paranormal groups that exist (hundreds, dude, HUNDREDS), your chance of EVER getting on a TV show are slim. I think we all have a better chance of getting hit by lightning, while winning the lottery, during a shark attack than getting on a paranormal TV show. You can’t be in this for the fame. You HAVE to want to do this to help people. Because that is what investigating the paranormal is all about. It’s about helping the living to understand the dead. And in the end, you have a new set of friends who are more like family who will investigate with you and trust you with their lives.

And that’s what we do.

Now that you’ve read all of that, are you still ready to jump in with both feet and spend six months with us, training to become a full-fledged paranormal investigator with Paranormal Georgia Investigations? Then email us at PGIBoard@gmail.com and let us know you’re interested! We’ll email you an application and let you know, after the first of the year, when we would like to get together and meet with you.

Good luck!

About Heather S. Dobson

I wish I was Wonder Woman, but I'm actually a wife, mother of three young ones, a writer, a paranormal investigator, and a lunatic. I'm also hoping to win a Nobel Prize in physics, but I guess that means I should get something above a BS in said subject and do more in-depth, life-changing studies besides "the sticking power of mac 'n cheese on smooth wallpaper." Alas...
This entry was posted in general, investigators, research, science and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Do You Have What It Takes To Be A Paranormal Investigator?

  1. hellohahanarf says:

    it all sounds great, especially the part about hanging out with you for a few months, but i am a chickenshit when it comes to ghosts so NOPE.

  2. I empathise with you! I’ve been a paranormal investigator on my own and also with a couple of groups for fifteen years (I’m just putting my own group together now) and it takes all of the above and more. Take my latest acquisition…The Portal. It’s cost me the better part of 350.00 pounds. Check out Huff Paranormal for more info on that, it does an amazing job with ITC research. I’m with you in spirit. Marcus

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s